I had a conversation with some one I care a lot about last night about how she has always felt the need to be “perfect” and that if she made a mistake God would pull away from her. We also talked about how she is learning that that is not the case, that God draws closer but at times we pull way from Him. This was a religious conversation and both of us being raised LDS, yet having very different experiences with it, got me thinking. Specific religion aside, do lots of us feel this way? Do we feel the need to be “perfect” or to be the star student of life? If we make mistakes do we feel less than or even un lovable? This thought makes me so so sad. There is physically and spiritually no way to be “perfect” in this life so if we are disappointed to the point of hating our selves every time we aren’t perfect then how do we find joy or self worth?
Here are some of my thoughts and beliefs, we are children of God and he loves us. Think of how much we love our kids and the joy they bring into our lives even when they aren’t perfect and make mistakes. If we can love them that much, just imagine how much a perfect Heavenly Father must love us. If we are constantly striving to be perfect then I think we are missing out on the joys that can only be found in life’s imperfections. When I make mistakes I always find the lesson to be learned and try and find the opportunity to grow into an even better version of my self. There are also things I know I will NEVER be able to change or do perfectly. THAT IS OK!!! In fact I think that is more then ok, that makes me who I am. Just like your imperfections make you who you are. God made us all differently for a reason.
If I had an opportunity to scream one thing and one thing only from a mountain top, for all the world to hear, it would be “STOP JUDGING EACH OTHER AND YOURSELVES SO HARSHLY!” Ok, I know that is technically two things but they are similar enough. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. The way that God forgives us when we repent. Even if you have to do it every night after you tuck those babies of yours into bed. “I forgive myself for the mistakes I made as a mommy today.”
Recognize that you did the best you were capable of today and that is that. So you yelled when your toddler spilled the milk all over the floor instead of turning it into some darling commercial moment where you laugh while cleaning it up together. THAT’S REAL LIFE. You yelled because you are human and as such we don’t always stop to laugh at life’s accidents. Sometimes instead we blow them way out of proportion and even make them worse. Forgive yourself. Your husband came home from work and you didn’t run to him with open arms and kisses? Instead you angrily asked why he was five minutes late and threw your kids at him, then ran away to your room!!! Guilty.
Let’s forgive our selves. Let’s say sorry when we are wrong to the people we love and to our Heavenly Father but then let’s move on and just do our best the next day. If you don’t have this problem, then help teach someone else how to over come it. We are all fighting to survive life’s ups and downs. So let’s remember the good news, we are children of a loving and perfect Heavenly Father and he will never abandon us. We have a savior that died for us so we can be forgiven, so let’s live in a way to merit that forgiveness and forgive our selves and others more quickly. Perfection is impossible but doing our best isn’t. Love you all.